The Gleaner

Daddy daycare! Rookie dads and the transition to fatherhood

Evan Dixon/Features Writer

THE SWITCH f rom eligible bachelor to poop-cleaning baby holder is a steep learning curve, and waking up at 3 a.m. to a screeching infant is something that no one wants to get used to, but every father must. These rookie dads shared with The Gleaner how they have been enjoying their transition into fatherhood.

MARKLANDO WILLIAMS

1. How did you feel when you first held your child in your arms?

The feeling was surreal, I cried tears of joy because the joy was way beyond anything I have felt or experienced before.

2. Has it been difficult to adjust to the idea that you now have someone for whose welfare you are intimately and directly responsible? Why, or why not?

No, it hasn’t been difficult. To be a father was always what I wanted, and now I’m in love with being a father.

3. What is one thing that your child does that makes you say, “This is definitely my child.”

It’s hard to say because she is carving out her own personality, but she hates to be covered with a sheet, as do I.

4. What’s the funniest thing that has happened while you were taking care of, or watching your child?

She was sucking her finger and I took it out. She then held my face with her two hands, kissed me and then put the finger back in her mouth

5. What kind of father are you? What kind of father do you hope to be?

I want to be a father like my father, but an even better provider, protector, friend and, most importantly, the father who teaches her to be God-fearing and loving even in this sinful world.

6. What are some of the challenges you’ve experienced raising a child in the midst of a pandemic?

My daughter was conceived and born during this pandemic. I haven’t experienced any notable challenges, and I get to spend more time with her.

7. Do you think raising a child in a pandemic will ultimately affect the way you raise your child and how she is socialised?

The pandemic has changed the norm we were used to and has created a new norm we have to adjust to. It won’t affect how we raise her, but evidently, how we socialise will change.

TIMON APPLETON

1. How did you feel when you first held your child in your arms?

I felt like a God-given purpose inside of me has been fulfilled.

2. Has it been difficult to adjust to the idea that you now have someone for whose welfare you are intimately and directly responsible? Why, or why not?

A family is all I have ever wanted from I was growing up. I used to watch many family shows and sitcoms that made me desire that perfect setting. So now that I am living it, I would say it is difficult to me; however, it is a feeling of accomplishment.

3. What is one thing that your child does that makes you say, “This is definitely my child.”

Lol. One night I was putting her to sleep and we both fell asleep, that’s when my wife saw the perfect opportunity to take a photo of us. When I looked at the photo, I realised that we were both sleeping in the same position with our head crooked in the same direction.

4. What’s the funniest thing that has happened while you were taking care of, or watching your child?

The other day I sent her out to the living room and closed the room door behind her. She turned around and started to beat down the door, screaming “Dada!!”

5. What kind of father are you?

What kind of father do you hope to be?

I see myself as a father that desires to teach my child the way of the Lord, and I hope to carry out that desire throughout my time here on earth.

6. What are some of the challenges you’ve experienced raising a child in the midst of a pandemic?

Not being able to carry her to some places I would want to, like the zoo.

7. Do you think raising a child in a pandemic will ultimately affect the way you raise your child and how she is socialised?

No.

IAN BENNETT

1. How did you feel when you first held your child in your arms?

The feeling was surreal. I watched as our baby grew from ultrasound to ultrasound and it all felt very real. But, holding her for the first time was the embodiment of “Oh my gosh, this is actually happening.” Every new skill she adds to her little life toolbox brings me back to that moment over and over again. And every single time I look forward to it.

2. Has it been difficult to adjust to the idea that you now have someone for whose welfare you are intimately and directly responsible? Why, or why not?

I would not describe it as difficult or easy but, instead, well managed. I have a much younger brother, and spending time taking care of him has somewhat prepared me for the day-to-day welfare. However, it has required a steady effort for planning in the long term as my daughter grows.

3. What is one thing that your child does that makes you say, “This is definitely my child.”

She will eat just about anything. I have never met a less picky and food-loving baby. She is a girl after my own belly, she really loves her food.

4. What is the funniest thing that has happened while you were taking care of, or watching your child?

So far as the top of the list is that she straight up threw up in my mouth, and then laughed about it with a very cute smile afterwards.

5. What kind of father are you? What kind of father do you hope to be?

I believe I am a father that is ready to listen, learn and understand my daughter. The father I hope to be is one that remains consistent in who he is, what he teaches, and how he lives as an example to his kids.

6. What are some of the challenges you have experienced raising a child during a pandemic?

Being comfortable finding safe childcare if my wife and I decided we need to have a break from parenting. Between actual sitters being expensive and the pandemic just making it difficult to see anyone safely, we had to get creative in finding a babysitter. In the end, we made use of the schoolmates and friends we made who have been tested regularly for COVID-19, who are also deprived of human interaction. When we were unable to find a sitter, we got good at mommy, daddy, and daughter dates that were very carefully scheduled around nap and bedtime. When our time was up, time was up, and it was time to go home.

7. Do you think raising a child in a pandemic will ultimately affect the way you raise your child and how she is socialised?

To be blunt, yes. Even as an infant so far, the amount of energy she has for social interactions is limited, which I believe is as a direct result of spending so much of her time meeting people in small groups or many weeks apart. She may very well develop more of a social appetite as she grows. She still socialises and interacts with people and other babies very well, with excitement and intrigue, but in smaller doses before it’s time for the next nap. Raising her with this in mind means there would need to be more room for patience when introducing her to new social situations.

ERROL WILLIAMS

1. How did you feel when you first held your child in your arms?

Seeing and holding him for the first time in the delivery room, I instantly felt unconditional love. I remember making a post later that day saying that I felt love at the ‘first cry’.

2. Has it been difficult to adjust to the idea that you now have someone for whose welfare you are intimately and directly responsible? Why, or why not?

No, it wasn’t difficult for me. I consciously made the decision in my younger years to not have a child until I was in the position to adequately provide both financially and emotionally.

3. What is one thing that your child does that makes you say, “This is definitely my child.”

EVERYTHING! He is a total mini-me, especially when it comes to giving trouble (lol).

4. What’s the funniest thing that has happened while you were taking care of, or watching your child?

There have been many instances, but one that I find most amusing was, once I left his food on the counter and went into the other room for a few minutes, only to come back and see that he took down the bowl, found a spoon, went over to sit at his little desk, and started eating his lunch. Guess I was taking too long for his liking

5. What kind of father are you? What kind of father do you hope to be?

I’m the fun dad. I sometimes give in to him and leave the discipline to mom. I aspire to be a dad who is an excellent role model for my child to emulate. I also want to be the dad who allows my child to safely and wisely explore the world, without forcing things in the direction I personally prefer.

6. What are some of the challenges you’ve experienced raising a child in the midst of a pandemic?

My son was one year and three months when the first COVID case was recorded in Jamaica and schools and nurseries were closed. Fortunately, I have the flexibility of working from home. Little did I know that attending virtual meetings and replying to emails with a toddler would be so hectic, especially when he wanted to be in my arms. I had to adjust my schedule to accommodate him being home, as his mom was required to be in office. When urgent matters arose, I was lucky enough to have family members close by to help out if his mom was unable to get time off from work.

7. Do you think raising a child in a pandemic will ultimately affect the way you raise your child and how he is socialised?

I think that raising a child during a pandemic has reinforced for all parents the value of quality time together, as well as the importance of patience, creative thinking to develop both fun and learning activities, and multitasking to balance personal and professional responsibilities. These are all hallmarks of my personal approach to parenting. The stability and continuity that my family unit has seen throughout the pandemic confirms for me that this is the right approach. In short, I plan to keep doing what I’m doing, because if this approach to parenting is working during a global pandemic, it can work through any obstacle or challenge.

FEATURE

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2021-06-17T07:00:00.0000000Z

2021-06-17T07:00:00.0000000Z

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